Are you feeling insecure? Has a recent dramatic change left you wondering whether it was your fault or not? Well my friend, continue to read! I dont have any home made remedies or recommended pills you can pop, but I can share my thoughts and feelings on the matter. So, here goes:
What is insecurity?: One of the definitions taken from thefreedictionary.com says “lacking of self confidence/assurance”.
Why are you insecure?: Never been paid a compliment? Infidelity? Always in competition for attention? Never really saw YOURSELF as “worth it”? Hang around other insecure/depressed individuals?
How did you get here?: Did something change in your life that changed your view of self? Verbal abuse? Physical abuse? Society and its “standards”?
When did you realize it?: Did you look in the mirror and go “whoa! whats happening?” “Where’d these strange feelings come from?
Who triggered these emotions?: a family member? significant other? close friend?
Where do you go from here?: lol….idk, but hopefully after a little venting we can all go on about our business!
Personally speaking, I have gone through every last question and found myself there. Forget putting the shoe on the other foot! I suited up in the whole wardrobe with the earrings to match! Now, I won’t go as far as to say that everyone’s insecure, but I will say confidently that a majority of us has had to check those insecure feelings at the door and get a move on.
I’ve never considered myself to be an insecure woman, BUT I have been guilty of comparing myself to the hottest person in America. Society at large has a tendency to send those little subliminal messages into the thinking space that gets you to well, thinking. But I got my biggest dose not too long ago.
I was an avid weave wearer for some years! When I say loyal I mean loyal! My mood depended on my hair. If it wasnt fried, dyed, and laid to the side I was bent all outta shape. So as I began to give some serious thought into going natural I figured I’d transition for a few months till i got to a desired length and then give it the ol chopperooski…lol. While doing so I never gave thought to emotions and feelings that were to come surely after. I never knew how important permed hair “seemed” to be until I was ready to let it all go. In the shop I was like YYYAAAYYYY but when I made it home I was like GIRL! I kept picking at it like it was going to grow before my eyes.
After I cut my hair off I tried to wear the same amount of make-up as i’d done before with the extra hair on my head and it just didnt look right. didnt feel right, just wasnt right. I began to feel like I’d made a horrible mistake. I began to notice my eyes arent level, the pudge in my stomach, I talk one sided at times, etc! But then I realized I never made the decision to be amongst the “liked”, I did it in fact to save some dern money!
Weaves can be very expensive when you’re getting quality hair. Deep down I knew I had nothing to fear with my big chop but it was kinda scary stepping outside the norm.
But then again, what’s fun in being normal and doing mediocre activities? I like to challenge myself and excite others!
Im fearless, Im courageous, I AM WOMAN!!!! I’m a Leo darn it, and thats what we do! It was a love/hate relationship in the beginning but now its love/more love.
I never realized how much I hid behind the weave until it was gone. I was never really outrageous with my make up routine however presently I dont wear as much as I used to. Its like an eye opening experience I suppose. A little foundation, mascara, nude lips, eyeliner and I’m good to go.
I’m being ME now.
My own beauty is enough. No extras, additives, or substitutes. I’m me, no one else can do me better…
If you’ve been here or are here, stretch out those arms, wrap them around you tight and squeeezzzze. Love on yourself sometimes. You definitely wouldn’t break your own heart, would you??